Stop worrying about these 7 parenting topics

By James Breakwell 1 min read

These are the top parent-shaming topics—and this is why they don’t matter.

Topic

Why it “matters”

Breastfeeding vs bottle feeding

If your baby doesn’t gain enough weight, they might lose at baby sumo.

Co-sleeping

No idea. I slept through it.

Traditional name vs something unique

It’s up to you if you ever want anyone to spell your kid’s name right.

Sugar vs sugar-free

You may or may not be raising an ant.

Bedtimes

If your kid doesn’t get enough sleep at night, they might get tired and nap during the day. The horror.

Potty-training age

No-one wants a 30-year-old in nappies.

Helping your kid with their homework

Should your kid fail on their own or fail with your help?

As long as parents raise their kids in contrasting ways, they’ll lash out to prove their method is the right one. That’s why campaigns to end shaming are so misguided. If centuries of armed conflict have proven anything, it’s that human beings aren’t great at tolerating minor differences. Just be glad your argument over baby formula ended with parent shaming and not the Thirty Years’ War.


Extracted from Bare Minimum Parenting: The Ultimate Guide to Not Quite Ruining Your Child by James Breakwell published by Atlantic Books at $19.99 © James Breakwell, 2018.

James Breakwell is a professional comedy writer and amateur father of four girls, aged seven and under. He is best known for his family humour Twitter account @XplodingUnicorn, which boasts more than 1.1 million followers. He is one of the most popular da


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